Jeremy Clarkson Slams Wood Windows

If you read Jeremy Clarkson’s column in the Sunday Times last weekend, you’ll have seen that, in the course of extolling the glories of naff 1970s fashion, he gave his views on wood windows in his typically trenchant personal style: ‘Let me introduce, at this point, the business of window frames. We all know, because it is an unwritten law, that anything made from UPVC is the absolute last word in retirement-home toilet settee terribleness. But why do we think like this? The wooden sash windows in my house rattle when there is a breeze, leak when there is rain and jam solid when there is sun. They are beautiful to behold, but as windows they are almost completely useless. So why not replace them with something cheap in long-lasting plastic? No, really, go on: give me one good reason. Fitting any other sort of window to your house is madness really. As stupid as buying a handmade English shotgun. It will look lovely, but for smoking a low hen you need total reliability – and for that you need a mass-produced plastic Beretta. We seem to have got in into our heads that things that don’t work very well are much, much better than things that do.’ By his own admission, Clarkson is “not a man given to considered opinion”.  You can read the full article on the Sunday Times website (behind the paywall – it’s subscription only). Wood Window Alliance Campaign Chairman Sean Parnaby responded: ‘Nostalgia for the 70s is fine, but Jeremy Clarkson could easily get his beautiful wooden windows repaired, replicated or replaced with new wood windows that would outlast even his love of Quavers. Clarkson’s preference for installing cheap plastic windows in his Chipping Norton manor house would be the equivalent of putting an American-quality plastic dashboard into an Aston Martin DB9. As the man himself would say, this isn’t just a matter of taste. It’s a matter of fundamental human sanity.’